I like to imagine my life filled with simple and beautiful notes that are playing an exquisite melody. Often my imagined world is shattered with the harsh dissonant notes that vibrate though. It makes me feel as if Fate is standing at the front door knocking and laughing at my agony. Du, Du, Du, Duuuuu … He, He, He, Haaaaaaa!
Life, experiences, people, none of them fit into some simple explanation. I often try to stuff them into some container that looks pretty or feels smooth. It always results in the container cracking, eventually exploding into a big mess. Chaos overruns my neat and orderly world.
I imagined this utopia only to be confronted by the dystopic nature of life. It pops though like the steady beat of a song. The constant reminder of my ever mortal nature ever pressing till it burst my imagined bubble of happy simplicity.
I am just an ordinary person with no grand words of wisdom or advice. Somehow life is just horrible at times. Even when my bubbles burst if I open my eyes and my heart I see that I am always surrounded by love.
This is the year of no resolutions.
It is very simple. The end of the year arrives with thoughts of all that that I did not do. Feeling the tailwinds of modivation I make a resolution or two concerning the upcoming year. I say “this next year will be better.” The next year comes in with high expectations only to be completely deflated within a few short weeks. Guilt quickly fills in where the high expectations fell flat.
This is a guiltfree year.